Often times your child isn't imagining anything. When your child tells you he has an imaginary friend, do not discount this as fantasy. If your child is half Vampyre/ half Demon I would suggest not using parenting books at all-they can backfire like a mother humper. Parenting books are useless if you're not human. Sleep deprivation can cause confusion and a map will help if you only have seven minutes and thirty-one seconds. Make a map of every closet and bathroom in your home if you enjoy having sex. Sweet baby Moses in a boob tube, there aren't any books on raising True Immortals so let me give you a few tips.

Īnd I thought being half Vampyre/half Demon was hard.That's nothing compared to being a mother. If your child is half Vampyre/ half Demon I would suggest. It's been a very difficult week - especially the no nookie part.Īll I know is this: I will say 'I do' on Saturday even if I have to go to hell and back to accomplish it.And I thought being half Vampyre/half Demon was hard.That's nothing compared to being a mother. With five days to plan the wedding, I have to figure out who's opening the portals and deal with our hostile allies who think our wedding is a farce.

I'm trying really hard not to go bridezilla on everyone. Not to mention Angel Jeff is going to fail us on the premarital test if we participate in any nookie before the wedding.

Tacky invitations and cake that causes food poisoning aside, I also need to deal with the stream of Demons entering my world from mysteriously opened portals. Being mated is great, but getting married is important to me. Yep, I know nuptials in the undead world are unheard of, but I'm still hanging on to my humanity if only by a thread. You get the royal wedding from hell - or, to be more accurate, possibly in hell.Īll I want to do is marry the Vampyre of my dreams, with my closest friends and family in attendance. What do you get when you combine a three-headed monster named Charles a rotund, gay, dancing Demon named Doug a culinary disaster baked by Mother Nature a celibate premarital councilor named Jeff an offer from Satan that's impossible to refuse and Steve Perry?

Robyn peterman fashionably dead series